I don't know if you had a chance to read this post or if you overheard us laughing at with you in our cubicles... but I noticed that you stopped signing out with your usual, "You got it, dude!" Now you use "Thanks."

This is the last thing I want to do but I'm just going to admit it - I miss the Full House quotes.

Sure they were odd but they sure peppered the day with a little comic relief. "Thanks" just doesn't cut it the same way as "Have mercy!"

Emptily yours,
RG

This is how things go at work: a client partner reports bugs to us (the developers) we troubleshoot, send them an IM that it is fixed and they respond with a simple, "Thanks."

But one guy signs off with one of the following phrases:

"cut-it-out. quit it."
"have mercy!"
"you got it dude!"

Do those look familiar to you? Yes - they are Full House quotes. You remember that show, dont you? It's the one where Bob Saget plays a loser and spawned 3 devils, one in particular that gives me nightmares to this day. I don't care what anyone says - that little Michelle was painful, like nails on a chalkboard.

I can understand Star Wars, Friends, or Seinfeld quotes. And if you do Pulp Fiction or Simpsons quotes - you are pretty much my friend for life. But Full House quotes? WTF?

The Sexton Hardcastle Foundation (SHF) believes that in your battle with sobriety, knowledge is power and attitude is everything. SHF created the Drink Strong program to educate people who don't drink, their friends and family, and sober bros. about battling sobriety.

The SHF announced today that four DRINKSTRONG wristbands have been purchased.

The Wear Black Skull and Crossbones DRINKSTRONG campaign was launched last month in an effort to raise funding for drinking money that helps alcoholics drink strong.

DRINKSTRONG wristbands represent unity in the battle against sobriety and hope for all those who are living without alcohol. Wristbands have been sold to two people, Sexton and Helens, in the United States alone. Since the launch of the campaign, wristbands have been spotted on a two people, Sexton and his cousin John.

Strong demand for the black skull and crossbones wristbands continues. The SHF currently sells an average of .00125 wristbands every day on eBay and Claire's stores.

Thanks for being who you are and for being there for me through all the rough times. The last two nights spent hanging out with you have been so awesome. Yesterday was especially fun since you were decked out in that sexy green outfit. I can't wait to hang out with you tonight and tomorrow night. I don't know what I would do without you. You are a true friend and I know I can always turn to you no matter what. I will always cherish the memories that I can never remember because of you.

I love you Beer,

- Sexton Hardcastle

Sexton Hardcastle wonders about girls who wear thongs: Don't you all get a lot of shitstains on those?

- People that are excited about the new Star Wars movie. Did nobody see Episode I and II? A lot of people seem to think that George Lucas will somehow magically figure out how to direct a good movie. Please realize that this is the guy that produced Captain EO. I cannot wait until all of your souls quietly die after viewing his next multi-million dollar piece of trash. On that day I will rejoice and dance with my Lord Satan in his fiery lair.

- Bugs that invade my house. Why do you guys have to infringe on other peoples' private property? You have the whole wide world to nest and lay your eggs, yet you choose to crawl around under my carpets and in my bathrooms. Go buy your own house to infest. From now on, all bugs caught in my bathroom will be thrown in the toilet and pissed on.

- Jay-Z belittling those with girl problems by saying that he has "99 problems, but a bitch ain't one." Of course he doesn't have girl problems; he's dating Beyonce! That girl's got a nice fat ass. If I was with Beyonce, I wouldn't have girl problems, either. I wouldn't even care about my 99 other problems. Also, what does it say about Beyonce that she's with a guy that (indirectly) refers to her as a "bitch"? Man, I wish I was a millionaire rapper.

- (Speaking of fat asses...) People that hate on Mariah Carey for her hoochie makeover. I honestly don't care whether she's hoe'd out or not. She gots tig 'ole biddies in fitty cities and a nice fat ass. What more could you ask for? She's all right with me.

- Fucking expensive donuts. I went to the donut shop before work yesterday and ordered two dozen donuts for my coworkers. Along with my Ham & Cheese Croissant ($2), the total came out to be $15 and some change. WTF!?! When did donuts get so expensive? That's the last time I do that for my coworkers. I don't even know why I bought those donuts. I guess I accidentally do nice things from time to time.

So you've decided to be evil...